SHOOTING YOURSELF IN THE FOOT
“The country is going to hell in a hand basket!” And, “Have you seen the price of gas lately?” Or how about this one, “And the cost of food? Why, we aren’t going to be able to afford to eat if this keeps up!”
The doomsayers, as they whimper and whine about [...]

SUSPICIONS CONFIRMED
Hello fellow Ranters!
Don’t you just love it when you are vindicated?
For a long time I knew in my heart that the common litterbug was a few bricks shy of a full load and now I have absolute proof!
Yes, I am talking about the common litterbug, otherwise known as litterbuggus disgustus, and in some areas [...]

SOME THOUGHTS ON FEAR
By
Charles Towne
Bertrand Russell said, “Fear is the main source of superstition, and one of the main sources of cruelty. To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom.”
We see these “NO FEAR!” signs everywhere. What the heck is that other than a macho clothing line? You show me a man who says he [...]

When I was knee high to a short toad I was always playing with sharp and pointy sticks. mama was always saying, “And don’t you play with any sharp and pointy sticks, if you do you are going to poke out both of your eyes and you will be blind for the rest of your [...]

HSSSSSSSS
By
Charles Towne
Of all government organizations the U.S. Peace Corps, by its very name denotes a benign, yes, even peaceful existence, after all it is called, “The Peace Corps.”
One can only imagine the pains the organizers have gone to in order to make the time served as safe as possible for the volunteers but then one [...]

When in my teens I found a very emaciated muskrat wandering near our home on the Fox River in Illinois. It was obvious the little fellow was starving, what wasn’t so obvious was, Why?
The wee wildling didn’t struggle as I gently begin to handle and examine it. Poking and prodding I searched for some obvious [...]

“All good things come to them that wait.” I waited.
Do you remember when we were kids and we would go out on a warm summer evening and catch lightning bugs?
A Mason jar full of lightning bugs could serve as a real neat makeshift lantern. Also, as I remember a forgotten jar of lightning bugs takes [...]

A BRIEF HISTORY OF CENTRAL FLORIDA’S LAKE APOPKA
For a very long time, people have inhabited the area around Lake Apopka. These people were what civilized man referred to as, “primitive”. Those primitive men called the lake, “Oomic gagagic ga goomba”, or in the white man’s tongue, “The beautiful lake that will last forever or until [...]

I was born and raised on an island located on the Fox River that flows near Oswego, Illinois.
The Fox is a most beautiful river and somewhat unpredictable, very much like a beautiful woman.
She, the river, could go for years without showing her ugly side, without overflowing her banks; but when she did, surprise! Flood was [...]

I love raisins, always have.
I could work up a serious drool just thinking about raisins and nobody had to worry about me abusing drugs but they better hide the raisins.
In that far off, mythical region called, “The brain” I have always believed that anything fit to eat must have raisins in it. Take oatmeal for [...]