Not only are most city people heartless but city animals are a lot nastier than country animals.
Let me illustrate.
Never have I had an evil bird encounter in the country.
As a naturalist I have been bat dived, crow cussed, hawk bit, owl clawed and otherwise tormented by all sorts of country birds while in the course [...]

I don’t like the city. Cities are cold and heartless.
I have never been mugged in a city but I have been embarrassed. The next worst thing to being mugged is to be embarrassed.
In my full and eventful life I have had a couple of city embarrassments that came very close to being fatal. (Whoever originated [...]

Dootsie Bobo was my very best friend. One day I stopped by his house to see what he was doing and when I opened the kitchen door I was immediately alarmed! There, on the table, in plain sight, was a great big plate of still warm, fresh baked, oatmeal cookies! The alarming thing was, THE [...]

DEAD RATS AND TACKLE BOXES
It is Monday morning and I decide to call my wife to find out how things are going on the home front. I am greeted with the news that we have suffered what can only be a death.
I listen sympathetically as my sweetie tells me that she thinks something has crawled [...]

“Men are incapable of rational thought and it is a well known fact that due to what is known among medical experts as the ‘lard’ gene, an amorphous and somewhat mushy blob located in the center of the brain cavity and taking up approximately eighteen square inches of space in the average man’s cerebrum, men, [...]

When I was knee high to a short toad I was always playing with sharp and pointy sticks. mama was always saying, “And don’t you play with any sharp and pointy sticks, if you do you are going to poke out both of your eyes and you will be blind for the rest of your [...]

MAD MAUDE AND HER TOADSTOOL CASSAROLE
by
Charles Towne
“Hey you folks, I’m up here, on the roof!” We looked up and sure enough, there was Maude.
Maude was one of the most unique people I have ever met and that day when she called to us from the roof was one example of her rare spirit.
There she was, [...]

“All good things come to them that wait.” I waited.
Do you remember when we were kids and we would go out on a warm summer evening and catch lightning bugs?
A Mason jar full of lightning bugs could serve as a real neat makeshift lantern. Also, as I remember a forgotten jar of lightning bugs takes [...]

The one thing I’ve learned from the writing life is that the hounds of knowledge always send the lions of fear running.
As a zoo director and wildlife photographer I have been mauled by an African lion, been on the verge of drowning twice, swam with sharks, wrestled alligators, had an African leopard shot off the [...]

SHADES OF THE MONKEY WRENCH GANG
By
Charles Towne
For those of you who have never read the cult classic, ‘THE MONKEY WRENCH GANG’ by Edward Abbey, do yourself a favor and beg, borrow or hi-jack a copy, you’ll love it.
It has been some twenty years ago when I was hiking way back on a large parcel of [...]